We went on vacation to -- where else -- the beach. We rented a house in Rehoboth. It took us a little time to get there, though. First we went stayed at Aunt Abby and Uncle Andy's house and then we moved a couple blocks over to the house we rented.

These are some pictures that I took. This first one is Joe sleeping on my tummy (yummy). I can make him fall asleep by stroking his hair forward on the front of his head. I seem to remember a movie where the someone has the ability to make wild animals fall asleep by touching them the right way... or something like that.



Sam Shoyer came and stayed with us. His brothers were with Paula at other friends in Rehoboth. I am glad Jack could have his buddy with him to share his vacation. We went to the boardwalk and Candy Kitchen. The guys got wax bottles.



We went to Jungle Jim's water park. There was a water park or at least a big slide in St. Louis Park in Minneapolis. I kept saying I wanted to go, but we never ended up doing it.





During the week after Sam Shoyer left we went back over to Aunt Abby's and went to the pool at her house and then to beach with all of your cousins. They have a lot of good toys for the beach. You can see all the surf boards. Uncle Andy has a pretty cool toy too. You rode in the yellow Bronco once when we were down there. It is perfect.



Michael and Jack had a good time together. I think Michael misses you.



Hey, check this little dude out. That is your brand new cousin, Noah. I haven't seen him for a while. He is three months old. Joe is now the older cousin. Hopefully they'll be buddies. Joe is really close with Joshua now. They have a very sweet friendship. They play together and hang out.



Here is Joshua skimboarding. Both he and Michael are really good at all of the beach and water sports.



Joe decided to try his hand at skimboarding. He looks like he might just be able to do it, doesn't he.





I am really proud of two things - one, that Michael is a really good surfer, and two, that I was able to get a picture of him getting up on his board. There is a lot of waiting around in surfing. You wait for the right wave. It takes a long time at Rehoboth.



We also hung out a lot with Richard, Helaine, Jake and Abby. Jake is all grown up now. This is him skimboarding. I am bummed that I can't picture you being as big and grown up as your friends, like Jake. I wonder what it will be like when I see Ari again. I haven't seen him or Simon almost all summer.



We played football. Your little brother Joe is quite the athlete. He is a lot like you that way.





Jack keeps getting more handsome. I am in love with him.



Jack was showing some serious bravery - helped by Michael. The two of them went on the Sea Dragon and then we all went on Chaos together. We are at a whole new level of rides at Funland.





A good thing that Joe likes the calm rides. Mom will be bummed in a couple of years when he only wants to do the scary ones. I'll go on Paratrooper with her.







We also went seining, which we have done on past vacations with Hugh and Liam. You go out into the Delaware Bay and use a net to catch fish and other sea creatures and then take a close up look.



I learned a lot about horseshoe crabs. We also caught a puffer fish and some other cool things.





This is the photo that I started taking with you. I have done it a few times with Joe now. I wonder how much longer I'll be carrying him on my shoulders. Hopefully we have at least one more summer left.

Joe tells me all the time that he loves me "to Saturan and back." If you didn't figure it out, he means "Saturn" the planet. Joe has a funny way of saying some things. I don't correct him because I think it is cute and he'll figure it out after a while. I don't see him being in college, listing all of the planets and saying "Saturan."

Joe is just a really sweet little guy. I hope we have a lot of summers left of him telling me how much he loves me. I'll carry him on my shoulders and his feet never have to hit the ground until he is a grown man if he'll just keep telling me how much he loves me.



This is Mom and you on the boardwalk. I think you are tickling her with a feather.

I surprised Mom last night. I told her that the minivan's battery was dead and asked if she would come pick me up.

When she got there I had her and the guys take the elevator upstairs with me. They didn't see that I pressed the LD button which stands for Loading Dock. When the elevator doors opened everyone was looking straight at the present I got Mom for her birthday.



We both got a little teary but that didn't last long. I was just happy that she was happy. I think the guys are psyched, but it probably won't be until we have it in the house and working before they get really excited.

The sign that we put on it has photos that we've taken at the photobooth at Funland. See the picture of you. I took that one of you and Mom in Rehoboth. I think it is nice because all of us on on there.

My friend at work, Marc, was really great about designing and printing the sign. I am going to have a more permanent sign made to put on the booth when we install it at home.

Oh yeah, I made the bow. I am pretty proud about that.

I love you. I said that out loud when I typed that. I hope you can hear me.

Your brother Joe is cute - but he is also a budding thief. Today Jack, Joe and I were walking in Georgetown and Joe grabbed a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup from the shoe shine stand in Georgetown Park Mall. As we were walking along, I saw these two guys point at Joe and laugh but I couldn't figure out what was so funny. Then I saw this orange wrapper peeking out from his hands clamped over his chest.

It took me a second to realize what happened and then I made him walk back and return it to the display. I knelt down next to him and told him that you cannot take things that don't belong to you. That you need to ask Mommy and Daddy if you want something, and then if it is okay, we pay money for it. I then told him that you can go to jail, and not the "Daddy Jail" when we wrestle, but real jail. I hope it sunk in. I think Jack was probably loving it.

The problem is that this is the second time in about a month that he has done this. When we went skiing, Joe walked out of the sweet shop in the lodge with a Tootsie Roll. I made him take it back, and told him then that it is wrong to just take things that don't belong to you.

I went on to explain to him how Tootsie Rolls were a favorite of yours. I told him how we used to watch that Redskins video I have showing Darrell Green pulling a Tootsie Roll out of his sock and saying how they makes you run faster.

The really super weird thing was later that evening everyone was watching TV and they played that same video because Darrell Green was running in the NFL's Fastest Man competition at the Pro Bowl in Hawaii. He is 45 and did really well, though he didn't win. I couldn't believe that coincidence.

You know how I am so into coincidences. Yesterday, I was looking at the first page of this book on Amazon that I had ordered a while ago but haven't gotten yet. I got an email from Amazon telling me the book -- which is a lot like this blog because it was written by a dad who lost his son -- was out of print. So I was checking it out online and I read the first line of the first page which says,

"In moments when I try to recall what my life was like when I was happy, I think of the Paratrooper ride on the boardwalk at Rehoboth, Delaware."

That sounds pretty familiar, doesn't it.

Mom wrote this:

"I had ridden the Paratrooper with friends in grade school; boyfriends in college and Allen as a newlywed. But nothing prepared me for a ride with Henry. It all started with that look, that Henry look where his eyes sparkled extra bright and his double dimples were tempting me to stick my fingers in or just gobble him up. And then he said, “You know mom, if you want to go, I’ll go with you.” Of course I wanted to go. After Henry first made me a mom and I had had time to think about all the stuff I wanted to do with him, one of the first things that occurred to me was I couldn’t wait to take him to Funland, just like my parents had when I was a kid. I couldn’t wait to watch him ring the bell on the fire engine or to ride on the carousel, but most of all, I couldn’t wait to ride the Paratrooper with my boy."

The book I ordered, Only Spring, was written by Dr. Gordon Livingston who lives in Maryland. He wrote the book that I read last month on vacation called Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart. It was really good and made me want to read more from him. When I looked him up on the Internet and saw that he wrote a book based on his journal that he kept when his son was dying after a bone marrow transplant, I knew that I needed to read it.

He has lost two sons, which is so incredibly sad. His one son's transplant was back in 1992, I think. From what I have read, Dr. Livingston is very wise and compassionate, and I am interested in reading more that he has written. I know it will rip my heart out to read Only Spring, but I think it is a healthy thing to do.

This week I went to a lunch and listened to a woman speak who has lost 4 children. Her name is Jeni and she is the mom of Mattie Stepanek. I wrote to you about him when he died a few months ago. The lunch was sponsored by a group called Heartsongs and it honored Mattie and his mom to raise money for Children's Hospital here in DC. The organizers let us sell Hope for Henry "Live Well Laugh Hard" wristbands and we made a lot of money, too.

Mattie's mom was amazing. She didn't cry talking about him -- she made everyone else cry. I couldn't do what she did. She was so impressive. It was nice to learn all about Mattie. He sounded so much like you. He was an expert on everything Harry Potter and like you made all of his nurses fall in love with him. But what you two really shared was your special outlook on life. Mattie's motto was "Remember to play after every storm," and Mom wrote about you, "He had ice cream for dinner and transitioned from the hospital to running a lemonade stand in a matter of minutes."

I wish I can describe you to people the way that Jeni described Mattie. You really got to know just how special he was.

After the lunch I went over to Children's Hospital with a friend from work for a meeting with people there. One interesting this is that Dr. Jonas, the doctor who fixed your heart in Boston, is now working here in Washington at Children's. Wouldn't that have been easier.

When I got over there, it struck me as not the nicest hospital I have ever been to - and you know I have been to a bunch. We actually ended up there with you twice for different things. Walking around the floors this time I couldn't help but notice that it was really crowded and just felt sad.

The good news it they are building a new building and it will be a lot nicer than what is there now. We are going to help put in great TVs and XM radios and stuff for the kids and families. Don't you think that children's hospitals need to be the nicest, most fun places on earth.

Photos of the day. Different carousels, different parks. Maybe one of these is Funland.

I had been pretty sad for a couple of weeks last month and then I pulled myself out of it. I really don't know what was wrong. I got a little worried so I went to talk to the person who is like a doctor who helps me with these things. I told her what was going on and she said it sounded like I was dysthymic, which means sad, but not so super sad that you need medicine or anything.

I've never heard that word before. I doubt I'd ever use it in conversation.

"Hey, how are you doing?"

"Oh, I am feeling kinda dysthymic today."

And then just as I had gotten sad, I started to get happy again. Today has been a day when I got sad again, but I don't think it will last too long. When I get like I am today, I feel like I have had the wind knocked out of me. Remember when you fell off the playground equipment at Adas and they called the Emergency Squad. I think you must have had the wind knocked out of you.

Another thing that made me sad this morning is an advertisement I read in the newspaper. It seems that this girl named Alexandra Scott, who was just a little bit older than you (Jack is now older than you ever were - Mom pointed that out to me the other day) died on August 1.

The advertisement was taken out by a car company called, Volvo. The ad said,

Life dealt Alex the most "bitter" of lemons yet she made out of her life the sweetest lemonade. She captures our hearts. She inspired us with her ability to live life to the fullest, to help others. In doing so, she humbled us.

The other day when I went to Georgetown to drop off band-aids, I picked this brochure up at the front desk of the clinic.



I read it and thought it was really great what Alex was doing. I figured that she was going to be okay. I also thought of you because Mommy had written this for the Hope for Henry Foundation.

Henry embraced each opportunity for living completely and reminded the rest of us to do so. His sparkly eyes, mischievous grin and infectious smile taught us the importance of maintaining normalcy within the family unit in a life fraught with illness and uncertainty. He had ice cream for dinner and transitioned from the hospital to running a lemonade stand in a matter of minutes. He did all these things because at that moment in time he could – and because he knew enough to go when the going was good. HFHF will continue Henry’s magical way of making each day matter.

I won't be sad long this time. We are going on vacation to the beach. You can't be sad at a place called "Funland," right.

I had a dream last night. We were all leaving the hospital together. We knew you were going to die but you were well enough to leave. When we were all walking to the car I realized that we should go to Disney World. Then I woke up. It was good being with you. It wasn't sad; it was nice.

Today we went to a picnic for the Gan. Joe is starting there in the fall. The picnic was at Discovery Creek at Glen Echo. We haven't been back there since we were there with you. Joe rode the carousel.





He wouldn't go on the carousel at Funland, so this was a big deal. In all of the video of you that I am putting on DVD, there are a lot of carousels. Tonight there was even a real horse. Joe and I watched video that we took of you riding Jester at St. Michaels.

When Mommy was putting Joe to bed tonight he said he wanted the pony to come to our house. Then he said he wanted Henry to come to our house. That made Mommy cry.

I am missing you a whole lot lately. I think it is because of all of the video and the Gan and everything. I have been pretty low, but I am trying really hard to pull myself up.

I love you.

Here are more pictures from the beach. Mom asked me if I think I'll ever be able to go to the beach without being sad. I said that I know one day I'll be able to go and only smile when I think of all the great times we had there - just not now. I have been going to Rehobeth since I was your and Jack's age. It will always be a special place for me.









Jack got bit on his hand by this turtle. Luckily, the little guy didn't break the skin. It was pretty upsetting for your brother. A man who was nearby said that even the Crocodile Hunter get nipped from time to time.



Here is Abby and Andy's house. It is getting fixed up a bit. Everyone is supposed to go down for the Fourth of July. Hopefully the house will be done. I am sure it will be nice.



Check this out. When we were riding the big bike we passed this trailer. Isn't it cool how Aunt Alice and Uncle Peter's house is on it. I miss it and the times we all spent there.



Joe is now old enough to enjoy Funland. He didn't really go on any rides but he did sit in the firetrucks and rang the bell.







Joe found elephant heaven in a bookstore on Rehobeth Avenue. He loves to line them up. I think he'd love the circus.



The Coast Guard has a training exercise in the middle of Rehobeth Beach. I was very worried until I realized it was just a drill. They should have put up a sign so all the people watching wouldn't have worried.